The Road to Surgery — Field Notes

We headed out early this morning. The moon so big and round, a beacon to nudge us along the way. More than gravitational pull, it was a summons to keep moving forward. God's beauty on display. A reminder of God's power and faithfulness from before time began. The moonlight showered an ease over the fretfulness that lived in my soul this past week.

Marty and I sat quietly holding hands as we traveled the moonlit road, comfortable in the cocoon of 25 years of marriage. I thought about the many roads we've traveled together. Smooth roads, rough roads, happy roads, sad roads, angry roads, joy roads....and now this road. A road of its own. An unexpected road. A road that detoured us at the cancer mile marker. A road that will become the "after road" for us. A road that has changed our direction, for the better actually I think.

Now we will walk the recovery road. A road I am so relieved to be on. I am so happy to have the expanders out and implants in. I am so happy that I woke up with the normal post-op hang over without hallucinations or delusions. I am so happy for the many of you who have been on this road with us.

I go for an early post-op visit in the morning. Maybe he will unwrap me and we will see what's beneath the bandages. I will clarify my restrictions. I am in so much LESS pain that I can tell I will have problems with rules this time. The only way I will be able to keep myself in check is to remember that I can mess these up and then need another surgery to fix them. That is motivation!

For tonight I will wallow in the presence of my family and have peace in the mystery of what is to come.

God's peace to us and you in whatever mystery you are living in right now. He is the author of our lives and while things are mysterious to us, nothing is a mystery to Him. Rest in this.